Building the Mirror: Daily Habits to Elevate EQ through Self-Awareness
When organizations search for great leaders, they often prize strategic thinking and results. Yet the leaders who consistently outperform share something less tangible: high emotional intelligence (EQ). My PhD dissertation research focused on measuring the relationship between self-awareness and leadership effectiveness. Not surprising to those of us who live our lives with an EQ development mindset, there is a strong and direct correlation. High self-awareness supports effective leaders. Low self-awareness is associated with ineffective leaders. Self-awareness is the “first gear” that powers the rest of EQ—self-management, empathy, and social skill (Boyatzis, 2018).
The Science Behind the Mirror
EQ is more than a buzzword. Boyatzis and colleagues found that leaders with strong emotional competencies outperform those without, especially in complex, fast-changing environments. Their teams report higher engagement, lower turnover, and stronger performance.
Dr. Tasha Eurich’s research warns that most leaders dramatically overestimate their self-awareness. In her 2018 book Insight, she differentiates internal awareness—knowing your values, emotions, and impact—from external awareness—understanding how others experience you. Leaders need both to avoid blind spots that can erode trust and decision quality.
Five Daily Habits to Strengthen Self-Awareness
Start with intention. Each morning, identify the emotional tone you want to set—calm, curious, energizing.
Track emotional triggers. During the day, notice when you feel reactive. Ask, “What just happened?” to spot patterns.
Invite truth-tellers. Create a “personal board of directors”—trusted peers who will share candid feedback.
Debrief key interactions. After meetings, reflect: How did my words and energy affect others? Did I listen fully?
End with reflection. Conclude each day with a three-minute journal on insights and opportunities for tomorrow.
Why It Matters
Self-aware leaders model authenticity, foster psychological safety, and build resilient cultures. By adopting daily habits that cultivate internal and external self-awareness, you not only elevate your own EQ—you create the conditions for your team and organization to thrive.
Learn More:
Contact Dr. Patti (DrPattiTampaCoaching@gmail.com) to discuss how leadership coaching focuses on self-awareness and high-impact actions.
Boyatzis, R. E. (2018). The competent manager: A model for effective performance. John Wiley & Sons.
Eurich, T. (2018). Insight: The surprising truth about how others see us, how we see ourselves, and why the answers matter more than we think. Crown Business.